The Neighborly Absorption (Part 5)
Written by David J. Greenspan
Article published in Northampton Living (June 2021)
Does the saying, “your home is your castle,” apply if you live in an actual castle? In the game of chess, castling can be a great way to protect your king as well as plan attacks. The four rules for castling in chess are that the king can not be in check, the squares that the king passes and lands on must not be under attack, all the spaces between the rook and the king must be empty, and they can not have moved from their original squares. The closest I came to a castle was the time I ran a small paddleboat company called Moat Boats whose motto was, “You can bike, hike, and howl because these trails won’t follow themselves.”
If you start playing Pink Floyd’s Dark Side of the Moon when the MGM lion roars for the third time in the 1939 classic, The Wizard of Oz, you may enjoy the road of yellow bricks in a new light. When the “Produced by Mervyn LeRoy,” credit fades between “Speak to Me” to “Breathe,” your sync is fine. Aluminum dust in the makeup forced actor Buddy Epson to drop out as the Tin Man after 10 days on set. His work on the film was not forever lost as his vocals can be heard within the film’s soundtrack when he, Ray Bolger, and Judy Garland sing, “We’re off to see the Wizard.” It’s the part in the movie when the newly lubricated Tin Man desperately gets the relief he needs for his tight joints.
The longest monosyllabic words in the English language are scraunched or strengthed. The longest two syllable word is squaitched-mouthed which means lying or deceitful. Barnaby Jones, “Hiding from the truth is kind of like turning your back on a tornado, it still won’t stop it from blowing you away.”
The Outskirt Depot’s assistant coordinator of quality control & owner of Diplo Industrial Shipping Services, Cornish Terasero said not to worry about the recent shipping delays of the disses & misses sock line. He said, ”At DISS, we got that. We still have plenty medium slim ultra-husky socks for layaway. Pack fresh, expedited, never slighted large & small package delivery. We had to reduce the size of the Arboretum to make room for the construction of a new school - MA FAE - For Aspiring Estheticians. Experience the best optics in your life at Hocus Focus. The mirrored animal maze will be at the depot by Arbor Day.”
“TOD” has 3 of the 4 new eateries; The Silver Soiree, Beryllium Bash, and Germanium Get-Together that are open 23 hours a day. For an easy breezy afternoon delight, The Pond of Yum specializes in soup-dehydration for walk away ramen. Peas at last, peas at last, peach pie all-mighty & corned beef hash. With the 4th of July coming our way, I just want to remind everybody that when it comes to eating contests, there is no winner.
