“Did you ever think you’d come into a mess like this?” Harriet Rogers asks. Though I’ve only known her for about an hour, I’ve learned quickly that she is wryly funny.

Truthfully, this interview is a little messy. In the day room at Rockridge, the assisted living facility where Harriet has lived for the past 17 years, she holds court on the couch. Around the room, 3 generations of her family listen attentively, pass around old photos, share anecdotes or shout questions. The shouting is necessary because sometimes everyone speaks at once. They are thrilled to memorialize her, and they don’t want me to miss a thing. Her nieces Susan and Jackie Ahlemeyer sit to her right; Jackie’s husband Bill and brother-in-law Bill Klaes are in the back; and Jackie’s son Brian his kids Jackson, Charlie, Joey and Grace, who have flown in from California, sprawl on the opposite couch. There are countless others here in spirit.